Pelvic floor balance is an often overlooked aspect of men’s sexual health particularly when it comes to sexual performance. The famous Kegel exercises are constantly touted as the king of all pelvic exercises because of their benefits in strengthening the pelvic floor muscles, while their counterpart, Reverse Kegels, rarely get a mention.
If you’re a man struggling with premature ejaculation or seeking ways to last longer in bed, knowing how to do Reverse Kegels can be an absolute game changer in unlocking improved sexual control and stamina. I have experienced the benefits first hand and used them to vastly improve my sexual stamina, so if that’s why you’ve come here, you’re in the right place
What Are Reverse Kegels
To put it quite simply, reverse kegels are the most important exercise that men who want to learn how to control their sexual energy need to learn and master.
Reverse Kegels are a type of exercises designed to relax and stretch the pelvic floor muscles, they can help a man find the balance between tension and relaxation. Now, because most men are dealing with an excess of tension or even hypertension in the pelvic floor. It’s vital they learn how to bring deep relaxation to this area.
Reverse kegels are the flip side of the coin to the traditional kegel exercises, which focuses on contracting and strengthening these muscles. Reverse kegels, however, involve a push down or expansion of the pelvic floor that essentially creates more space and deep internal relaxation.
Personally I’ve found reverse kegels to be incredibly powerful in helping cure my premature ejaculation as well as hundreds of the men I’ve coached throughout the years.
The Importance of Reverse Kegels
When it comes to overcoming premature ejaculation and improving sexual stamina, developing a balanced pelvic floor is absolutely essential. Just as over-relaxed pelvic muscles can lead to issues such as urinary incontinence (peeing when you don’t want to), an overly tight pelvic floor can also contribute to problems such as premature ejaculation.
Reverse Kegels are so useful because they basically stop the involuntary contractions that trigger the point of no return. The involuntary contractions can be felt as little spasms, or twitches around the base of your manhood.
When your pelvic floor is overly tense, these involuntary contractions will get triggered very easily and this spikes your arousal because the pleasure and erotic energy literally has nowhere to go.
When you’ve relaxed your pelvic floor with the help of reverse kegels and the other techniques I recommend (check out how to last longer in bed) You’ll find those involuntary kegels much weaker and easier to manage.
Pelvic Floor Hyper-Tension
I claim that any man who is struggling to control his sexual energy is experiencing too much tension in the pelvic floor. In fact men today are so unaware of the amount of stress and tension that gets stored in their body’s, it’s no wonder premature ejaculation is at an epidemic level of proportion.
To drive this point home, here’s a list of things that are generating excessive tension in your pelvic floor.
- Survival stress
- States of fear and anxiety
- Excessive time sitting (work, driving, tv)
- Unprocess or unacknowledged trauma
- Kegels (I used to do thousands daily and it made my issues worse)
- Extended cardio such as running (I’ve noticed my pelvic floor is tight AF after a long distance running)
- Weight training (e.g. squatting heavy requires a very strong clench of the pelvic floor)
As you can see, our pelvic floor muscles are usually getting plenty of time under tension, which is also the reason I advise men to switch to reverse kegels instead. Because their pelvic floor is usually very strong anyway and beyond that, overly tight as a result of little to no stretching.
I cannot tell you how often men come to me asking for help, complaining the kegels didn’t help them. Now you understand why.
How To Do Reverse Kegels
Having a clear understanding of how to do Reverse Kegels is essential for reaping their benefits. Many guys get confused or disheartened in the application and do not persist for long enough to master the technique and reap the powerful rewards. So here’s a step-by-step guide that will help you get started.
- Empty bladder: This is advisable for obvious reasons.
- Find the Right Position: Start by finding a comfortable position—lying down, standing, or sitting. As a beginner, you may find lying down the easiest but personally I prefer standing because it allows me to engage a stronger push. I suggest you experiment with every position possible and notice the differences.
- Deep Belly Breathing: Pay attention to your breathing. Take slow, deep breaths, ensuring you engage your diaphragm and that your belly rises and falls with each breath. There is a relationship between your diaphragm and your pelvic floor, you’ll notice with practice that they move in unison, so by deepening the breath your pelvic floor will also expand.
- Identify Your Pelvic Muscles: The muscles you use to stop your urine flow are your pelvic floor muscles. Everything between your anus and your balls. To create the mind/body connection you can do some light kegels to locate the muscles before focussing on the deep relaxation and expansion.
- Relax and Stretch: Instead of tightening these muscles, do the opposite. Imagine you are trying to pass gas or have a bowel movement. You should feel a slight “pushing down” sensation. If you’re doing it right, it should feel like a small space or ‘balloon’ is inflating internally.
- Hold and Release: Hold your breath along with this relaxed, stretched position for about 10 seconds, then release.
- Rest: Make sure to rest your muscles for 10 seconds between each repetition.
- Progression: I recommend doing sets of 10-30 twice a day and work your way upwards from there.
As you progress, you can increase the duration and intensity of the exercise. Longer holds, deeper breaths, also engage the abdominals to generate extra pressure. However, remember, it’s not about straining yourself to the maximum — it’s about being consistent and patient with your body and developing a new pattern and habit.
Essentially you need to become a master of the reverse kegel, so you’re able to apply it in all manner of positions. The mantra I teach my clients and students is to ‘RK ALL DAY’. Which is to say, you should be practicing all the time, so you drill it into your brain and then when it comes to longer lasting lovemaking, it’s second nature.
When To Do Reverse Kegels
Reverse Kegels can be incorporated into your daily routine just like regular Kegels. However, it’s recommended to practice them when you’re relaxed—perhaps early in the morning or before bed. It will be much harder to practice them after a heavy session in the gym or a long day sitting at your desk because of the tension you will have accrued.
If you want to make love, you will need to make efforts to relax yourself beforehand so your body and pelvic floor is not overly tight.
I highly recommend incorporating them alongside other key exercises such as the keep squat and tennis ball massage which will further help to alleviate the excessive tension in your pelvic floor. When you get masterful with these I recommend practicing them while moving the hips and even walking to test your ability to hold them.
For more details on the full breakdown of techniques for lasting longer in bed and how they all tie together make sure to check out this guide.
Reverse Kegels During Lovemaking
This is where the rubber hits the road, quite literally. Once you’ve learned to do reverse kegels without thinking too much about them, you’ll be ready to experiment with them during lovemaking.
You’ll find that certain positions will be much easier than others to employ this method. Standing or kneeling for example will be much easier than in missionary where you must brace your core to come degree. This will make it much harder to reverse kegel, although not impossible.
When your lover is on top, the reverse kegels will be easier as her body weight is pushing down on your belly and putting pressure on the pelvic floor.
The easiest way to practice these will be by connecting to your breath during lovemaking. As you fill your belly, you can also feel the pelvic floor subtly expanding and this will allow you to remain present and connected to your love and also move the sexual energy throughout your body.
Mastering The Reverse Kegel
As we’ve discussed already, the reverse kegel is an exercise and ability to master. When you get good at it, you can literally hold it for minutes at a time and this keeps your arousal levels in check while you’re making love.
I’m not going to sugar coat it, this is not an easy thing to master. It takes time, commitment and serious consistency. However, it’s extremely useful and I can honestly attribute huge improvements in my ability to last longer during lovemaking to the reverse kegel alone.
Of course, it’s not the only thing. Curing premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction and performance anxiety are multi-layered problems that require comprehensive solutions to heal naturally and permanently.
This is exactly what we cover in The Legendary Lover Online Course and men’s group. If you want detailed, step-by-step instruction with the exact steps I’ve taken and helped hundreds of other men to follow, you can check out the program here.